By Ben Apatoff
LORDI look like GWAR. Now that that's out of the way, remember that originality is overrated, and that being a pioneer doesn't necessarily mean being the high standard. Judged on its own, Lordi's music is exactly what it should be–stoopid, basic, catchy hard rock with song titles that were probably taken from JOEY DEMAIO's notebook. The Finnish metal beasts' fifth album, Babez for Breakfast, isn't quite up to the comedy metal of Gwar or STEEL PANTHER, and it's nowhere near as idiosyncratic as their best labelmates on The End. But I bet it sounds awesome when performed by pyro-happy monsters.
To paraphrase a similarly goofy (but less enjoyable) artist, Babez for Breakfast ain't looking for nothin' but a good time. Sample choruses include "It's the ZombieRawkMachine, yeah, yeah!" and "This is heavy metal, no matter what you say!" The fist-pumping guitar riffs, ham-fisted keyboard solos and obligatory cowbells are all almost illogically entertaining, but Babez for Breakfast's best moments are all in vocalist MR. LORDI's lyrics, whether in the KING DIAMOND homage "Granny's Gone Crazy," warning listeners to heed the "Rock Police" or just bragging about his girth in the year's best LEMMY impression on "I am Bigger than You." Anyone who can't bring themselves to like something about Babez for Breakfast is taking life too seriously.
Rating: 3 Babez out of 5 Breakfasts
