Maximum The Hormone announced in September they had signed with Warner Music Japan and promised a brand new song in November. They've done exactly that and the song is titled "これからの麺カタコッテリの話をしよう," or "Let's talk about future noodles catacotti" in English. Which is equally unhelpful as a song title, though it does have something to do with guitarist Maximum the Ryo-kun losing a ton of weight.
According to the translated version of the YouTube description, that's because he was diagnosed with "complication of lifestyle-related diseases and warned that he was going to die if he wouldn’t change his lifestyle by a medical doctor." So hey, good on him for taking his health seriously.
Here's the full translation, thanks to MetalSucks.
“Maximum the Ryokun [guitars] was diagnosed as complication of lifestyle-related diseases and warned that he was going to die if he wouldn’t change his lifestyle by a medical doctor. So Maximum the Ryokun started diet and exercise, lost weight and got well.
“Fans were totally shocked by his lean body and have been complaining “We liked him FAAAAAT!!” Yes, this is the answer song to such fans.
“What does the subtitle which is the same as the title of the next release item mean? This song was composed as ‘Part II’ of the song, “Maximum the Hormone” released 7 and a half years ago.
“How will the next stage of MTH who have had the belief of ‘Menkata Cottelee’ be?! Will head banging and growling be unsealed?! Maximum the Hormone 2nd brand new music video dedicated to all the gouty people (calorie mates)! Eat it with your eyes and ears!!”
If you're trying to skip right to the song, it starts around 1:20 in the above video. Whatever Maximum The Hormone ends up releasing next will be their first non-covers, non-reimagining release since 2013's Yoshū Fukushū (or 予襲復讐).
Oh, and shout out to YouTube user Stefano Gardin for translating the lyrics.
English translation:
Attention! (“me” means “eye”, but it can be used also to call for attention, which I think is the case here)
Leg pain!
Strike with fish eggs
Sobbing high fever numbness
Attacks of intense pain breeze
Pulse rate boom
A worried look on the face
Heavy decaying of stomach and guts
Seaweed OK Soybean OK
Of course all organs are XBlood in the feces that produce a stench
Is gluttony the cause?
Hypertension lipid abnormality
Uric acid level is dead!!
Riexamination on Monday ・Tuesday・Wednesday
Glycosuria thyroid anormality
Improvement of the diet
Challenge in fighting diseasesBeer (HELL!)
Dried sardines (HELL!)
Sea urchin (HELL!)
Sake (HELL!)
Liver (HELL!)
Skipjack tuna (HELL!)
Standing up is pain
Ah!! It hurts It hurts It hurts
Enough!! I’m getting pissed
I’m getting hungry I’m starving
(I’m starving!)
I want to eat an ice cream
Oh! must not must not must not!!
I’m getting hungry I’m starving
(I’m starving!)However, building・macho booing
At the gym barbell protein no!!
Carbohydrates are No Good??
Shut up!! 「Gourmet is dangerous」
However, building・macho booing
At the gym barbell protein no!!
Carbohydrates are No Good??
Shut up!! 「Gourmet is dangerous」
Enough with healthy boy!
Muscle Training Squat NO!
Sagging body nostalgic..
Chubby Ryoppi GO!
Enough with healthy boy!
Muscle Training Squat NO!
Wellness is boring!
Come back chubby Ryoppi! ..Impossible, y’all, sorry!
Shut up! Fuck you! Moguro boom!!
Boom!
I won’t go to the hospital again!
I’ll tell you what.. Urinary tract stones are dreadful
(Dreadful!)
Fat supporters, you know!
Fatness fans shut up!
I really love Pon・de・ringu
(Love it!)
Chunky = way of life Chunky = way of life
I will live way longer than you
(Live!!!)
BlehI don’t want to be gone yet
「Lost weight? 」Shitty reply
「He looks odd」I’m fed up with such comments
「I liked the old times better」Cliché
Yeah, it came out..
Public image right??
「Pfft! Surprising! 」harmful effect
Happy end? Bad ending?
This is the humanityShort temper is a disadvantage and I don’t want to complain baby
Letting it easily pass with a calm heart ok
Or perhaps I should say leave it alone!! You idiot
Booth!! Booth!! Booth!!
Lie this was just a joke
Look, little by little I started to have bursts
From the desire to eat at Ramen Jiro!!!!Beer (HELL!)
Dried sardines (HELL!)
Sea urchin (HELL!)
Sake (HELL!)
Liver (HELL!)
Skipjack tuna (HELL!)
Standing up is pain
Ah!! It hurts It hurts It hurts
Enough!! I’m getting pissed
I’m getting hungry I’m starving
(I’m starving!)
I want to eat an ice cream
Oh! must not must not must not!!
I’m getting hungry I’m starving
(I’m starving!)However, building・macho booing
At the gym barbell protein no!!
Carbohydrates are No Good??
Shut up!! 「Gourmet is dangerous」
However, building・macho booing
At the gym barbell protein no!!
Carbohydrates are No Good??
Shut up!! 「Gourmet is dangerous」
Enough with healthy boy!
Muscle Training Squat NO!
Sagging body nostalgic..
Chubby Ryoppi GO!
Enough with healthy boy!
Muscle Training Squat NO!
Wellness is boring!
Come back chubby Ryoppi! ..Impossible, y’all, sorry!
Shut up! Fuck you! Moguro boom!!
Boom!
I won’t go to the hospital again!
I’ll tell you what.. Urinary tract stones are dreadful
(Dreadful!)
Fat supporters, you know!
Fatness fans shut up!
I really love Pon・de・ringu
(Love it!)
Chunky = way of life Chunky = way of life
I will live way longer than you
(Live!!!)Chubby Ryoppi come back
No, impossible! Won’t tolerate more diseases!
Chubby Ryoppi come backChunky = way of life Chunky = way of life
I will live way longer than you
(Live!!!)
Chunky = way of life Chunky = way of life
I will live without sudden cardiac death (pokkuri death syndrome)
(Live)According to the Minister of health, work and welfare’s 2014 survey
The total number of people with lipid abnormalities in Japan is 1.6 million
The total number of people with diabetes is 3.16 million
Decease due to hypertensive diseases are 6932
The number of people with gout
In 2013 was over 1 million people
To reduce the risk of developing cardiac disease
It’s very important to improve living routines!
Not only the prescription of drugs, but also people’s awareness
And moreover, the awareness must be shared between doctors and patients
It’s also important the attitude assumed to face a treatment!!
Don’t ask me!
